What do we do when our halo shrinks and our Mojo is Nojo?
Last month I wrote about enhancing our feelings of Inside Confidence by thinking beyond the glass half empty or glass have full that we are holding in our hands. We talked about actively remembering the opportunities, outside of our immediate awareness, for replenishment and fulfilment.
(Check out March’s Gem if you’d like to revisit this info)
This month is a little foray into the topic of energy from the perspective of the “Energetic Charge” or “Emotional Charge” our feelings invoke.
At some point in coming months I will be writing about the energy centres of the Chakra system, demystifying them and looking at them individually. Showing how important each one is in increasing our personal confidence our vitality and enjoyment of life.
Confidence comes when we face the challenge in front of us and embrace it. It is inevitable that with the challenge comes an “Energetic/Emotional Charge”. So we can only embrace the challenge life is bringing us if we also accept the feelings that this particular life situation is invoking in us. We know that every challenge brings with it a silver lining, an opportunity to personally evolve and enhance our feelings of Self Confidence. However we can get stuck when the challenge naturally brings with it an “Emotional Charge”. It’s a bit like trying to make an omelette without breaking any eggs.
When we feel a negative charge about something we tend to want to run away from the discomfort so we distract away from the uncomfortable feeling while we blame ourselves, the person or the thing that is triggering that “emotional charge”.
Feeling of sadness at not getting the job could become: “I’m just not good enough”, “that interviewer was an arrogant “#@*t” or “I hate interviews”
Feeling disappointed that a date didn’t show up could become: “Maybe I’m boring”, “they are so selfish” or “It’s easier not to bother with a love life it never works out”
Feeling anger at our partner when you trip over their bike in the hall AGAIN (Ok heads up that ones mine), could become: “Maybe I’m being horribly unreasonable”, “they are deliberately ignoring my wishes” or “It is pointless trying to have a tidy house, I give up lets just live in squaller”
The truth is we are not so much daunted by these challenges as we are afraid of the “Emotional Charge” that they invoke, and instead of dealing with the charge effectively, we distract away from it by using our chosen “go to” defence. Which is often projecting anger outwards, victimhood or self flagellation.
Thus our halo shrinks and our Mojo becomes Nojo when we don’t know how to deal with our “Energetic/Emotional Charge”
NB: Our halo is our energy and our energy is our responsibility!
Eventually avoiding what our “emotional charge” is trying to tell us will cause our energy to shrink and we may then retreat.
Human beings need to grow because the opposite of growth is stagnation and at the very least stagnation is a buzz killer and at the very worst it leads to chronic unhappiness. Who doesn’t want to feel happy?
There is a very fine line between Excitement and Fear. Both come with heightened feelings of aliveness/charge! It is what we tell ourselves about the charged feeling that makes all the difference.
What do we do when our feelings feel so “Charged” that we don’t feel in control of them?
What do we do when we don’t want to feel the feelings we are feeling?
I encourage everyone who is facing a challenge to embrace it. Take some time out to feel the feelings that the life situation is generating. These feeling are messages from inside of you. In fact they are reminding you that you are alive.
They may be coming from your inner child that wants some affectionate support not scolding. Or perhaps coming from your chimp that is sensing danger which may be real or imagined? They may even be coming from your body which is looking for some quality attention. Perhaps you are not exercising enough or exercising too much.
If your feelings feel too “Charged” for you to handle you can always bring them along to a session and we can look at them together, in this safe therapeutic space.
If you don’t want to feel them then I promise you that is a sure sign that they need you to look at them. You can keep pushing them down and they will find another way to get your attention. That is a good thing!
All your feelings are good. They are coming to you for a reason. The least you can do is listen to them.
The truth is, we raise our self confidence because of our challenges – not in spite of them. Every challenge brings emotions and navigating these emotions will boost your Self Confidence. You will learn that you can enjoy yourself in the good times. You will learn that you can trust and encourage yourself forward in the not so good times.
What if your current challenge is actually a call to action from your mental, emotional and physical system to waken up and get to know yourself better? Wouldn’t you want to heed to the call? So that your life can be happier and more fulfilling because life is for living.
Inside Confidence is……….knowing how to expand our Mojo Halo!